The first time your Mountain Times staff heard of “viral videos,” we all invested in surgical masks and held our breath when passing video stores. Eventually, we learned better, realizing our precaution was silly, if not downright excessive. After all, the surgical masks did, in fact, allow us to breathe when passing said stores. The advent of YouTube made things even trickier. Here are some of our favorite viral videos from that clearinghouse of all things visually bizarre from the World Wide Weird.

Frank Ruggiero: Elektronik Supersonik

“Long live Space Race. Long live Molvania!”

They call it “a land untouched by modern dentistry.” And those who call it that also call it Molvania, the geographic subject of a faux travel guide, which describes the fictitious country as “a small, land-locked republic in eastern Europe, famous as the birthplace of whooping cough.” In addition, Molvania also produces 83 percent of the world’s beetroot.

The guide explains that Molvania’s rich musical heritage dates back to the days of the kvkadra, a simple brass horn used to drive away wolves. “Unfortunately, this instrument had a similar effect on audiences,” the guide adds. Five centuries later, not much has changed, though pop star Zladko “Zlad” Vladcik is trying his damndest.

To accompany its guide, publisher Jetlag Travel produced a music video for Zlad’s hit techno-ballad, “Elektronik Supersonik,” described as “a melodic fusion combining hot disco rhythms with cold war rhetoric.” Implementing the best blue-screen technology an ’80s hair band could finance on an 18-month, high-interest course of payment, along with the necessary synthesizer and key-tar, Zlad’s video became an instant cult classic, creating an eerily thin, glittering line between reality and parody, with many viewers unable to discern its authenticity. Decide for yourself at www.youtube.com/watch?v=lp_PIjc2ga4 or visit www.jetlagtravel.com.

Scott Nicholson: Jan Terri

Jan Terri doesn’t want to lose you tonight. You’re the only thing that matters.

The advent of “The Gong Show” and then “American Idol” glamorized or traumatized the legion of people who think they can sing well, but bad vocalization was in vogue long before Chuck Barry displayed poor taste in headgear, Gene Gene the Dancing Machine emulated an inflatable rubber ball and Simon Cowell donned his pompous smirk. There were the celebrity efforts like Leonard Nimoy’s “Ballad of Bilbo Baggins” and William Shatner’s “Rocket Man,” and then there were the underground audio tracks of terrible Beatles back-up screeching courtesy of Yoko Ono and Linda McCartney. While Wing and William Hung have parlayed their terrible tonal art into a cottage industry, there’s something painfully revealing about human nature in the earnestness of vocal artists who just plain stink.

Sadly, some people don’t realize they don’t have golden pipes. While I can happily admit that I ululate like a barking seal with a head cold, that doesn’t stop me from singing in the shower, though I am not applying to be the front man for any rock band unless it does nothing but Bob Dylan covers or I get to do my own weird songs. Some people are seeking recording deals when they should be eating chalk instead.

I submit, as evidence, Ms. Jan Terri. She not only had the admirable audacity to record her foibles for public exposure, she launched her own record label to better inflict her oral stylings on the world. Luckily, YouTube exists, because her dance moves are almost as scintillating as her music. “Losing You” is heart-rendering, but “Get Down Goblin” creates its own monstrous genre.

See for yourself: www.youtube.com/watch?v=dZ94vnmvPrw and www.youtube.com/watch?v=JqsRFKe3YMA

Caroline Monday: Leslie and the LYs

“With these shoulder pads I have the strength to destroy villages, homes and crops!”

Rarely do comic and musical genius blend so perfectly as they do in the YouTube efforts of Leslie and the LYs, an unsigned hip hop group out of Ames, Iowa.

Leslie and the LYs is the brainchild of Leslie Hall and has come to be something of an Internet phenomenon. In interviews, Hall has said the whole thing started with gemsweater.com, a Web site developed to display her collection of gem sweaters, which she “rescues” from the local Goodwill. Add some hilarious rapping, “200 pounds of all woman,” as Hall describes herself, and a fitted metallic jumpsuit, and you’ve got a hit.

As I suppose “gangsta” rap reflects life in the ‘hood, Hall’s “lady jams” reflect life in a mid-sized town in Iowa. The thing is, Hall is actually a very skilled lyricist and a pretty decent dancer. I sincerely like most of the songs, and not just for their novel qualities.

As for the YouTube videos themselves, hilarious and very entertaining. My favorites include “Gold Pants” as performed on Chicagogo and the “How We Go Out” video.

“How We Go Out” is your typical girls-night-on-the-town video, done Iowa style with dance scenes taking place in a local club, video store and thrift shop. The lyrics include gems, such as “You get me hotter than a stick a hot glue / And I’m scrapbooking everything we do” and “Let Reba crack the bass / Wave to the Hot Pocket people with the smiles on their face,” all set to a very danceable hip hop beat.

To see Leslie and the LYs’ videos, check out their YouTube profile at youtube.com/user/lesliehall.

Jeff Eason: Music of Yesteryear

Trampolines, along with mishaps, have found a home in perpetuity on YouTube.

Although I readily confess to searching for goofy videos on YouTube by typing words, such as “trampoline+mishap,” into the Web site’s search engine, most of the time I have used it to find old music clips of my favorite bands. Old television shows, such as “Top of the Pops,” “The King Biscuit Flower Hour” and “The Midnight Special,” featured live performances of everyone from Elvis Presley to Roxy Music to Georgie Fame & the Blue Flames. Somehow, many of these performances have found their way onto YouTube, and a fair number of musical treasures await the patient fan who is willing to wade through some videos with questionable sound quality to find the gems.

Not being the kind of guy who watches MTV or VHI music video shows (do they still exist?), I also use YouTube to find video clips of songs by newer artists. Two are my current favorites are “David” and “Zombie,” both by New York City singer-songwriter Nellie McKay. Check her out.

Okay, there is one goofy video that I saw this week that is worth sharing. It can be seen at www.youtube.com/watch?v=aeoi16lScf4. If that link doesn’t work, use the Web site’s search engine and type “wedding best first dance,” and be on the lookout for the Brubaker wedding.

Melanie Davis – Jimmy Smith Park

Out of the thousands upon thousands of YouTube videos posted, my “Best of” award would have to go to a group of ASU students.

A music video for Jimmy Smith Park caught my attention, and echoed my sentiments of this being the smallest park I have ever seen.

I appreciate the work that went into the park. The landscaping is very attractive. When I first moved to Boone, I drove past the park and thought to myself, “I guest the rest of it is on the other side of the creek, blocked by trees.” Was I ever surprised to see a parking lot behind the tree line.

The video is my favorite YouTube pick for more than stating the obvious about the size of the park. I have to hand it to these students – the song is pretty catchy. I watched the video again to refresh my memory, then walked around the office humming “Jimmy Smith Park” for the remainder of the afternoon.

Slightly annoying to my co-workers, I am sure.

I have no idea if this was a class project to make a video or not, but if that is the case, I hope they got an “A” for a job well-done.

Search for “Jimmy Smith Park” on YouTube to experience the musical styles of a few of ASU’s finest, or visit www.youtube.com/watch?v=PN9qTHP7IeA.