Speed Dating Offers Comfortable Avenue To Meet Others


By Mike Shands

Editor’s Note: With entertainment editor Jeff Eason on vacation this week’s columnist is staff writer Mike Shands.

Have you ever gone on nine dates in one evening? I and 17 other High Country single men and women did just that last week.

We participated in one of the most intriguing dating crazes to hit the High Country in quite a while – speed dating – in an event sponsored by High Country Media’s “All About Women” magazine.

Speed dating is not something archeologists do when they’re in a hurry to learn how old an artifact is. It is a series of many mini-dates in rapid-fire succession.

We began with an equal number of men and women. Some were divorced, some had never been married, some might be frequent daters, some might be terrified of dating and some might have been dumped by the love of their life recently.

We all had at least two things in common, though – we were all single, and we were all interested in meeting and/or dating someone.

Each woman was assigned a table, where she sat throughout the event. Each man spent five minutes per table talking with that women, then moved on to the next table until each participant had met every participant of the opposite sex.

At the end of the event we secretly checked whether we would be willing to give our e-mail address to anyone else there. If two of us checked yes for each other we were sent the corresponding e-mail addresses for further contact.

Talking the Talk?

As an admittedly shy person when it comes to meeting women I decided that a speed dating session might help me learn to come out of my shell more readily.

It’s not that I don’t have things to say to a woman, it’s that I’m not always good at expressing myself to one I’ve never met.

I’m one of those dating-challenged individuals who hasn’t dated a plethora of people and thus hasn’t developed the skill of small talk around members of the opposite sex.

If I find myself face to face with an attractive woman there’s usually a race to see if I can insert my foot in my mouth before I get my tongue tied in knots. The word “suave” seems to be missing from my personal dictionary.

Oh, I’m fine around co-workers and other women that I already know, but when I’m standing around in a room filled with strangers I’m clueless when it comes to striking up a conversation with a pretty woman.

Complicating matters is when one must attempt to figure out who is single, who is attached to someone else and who has a 6-foot-8, 270-pound insanely jealous boyfriend.

Boone presents a special challenge for many of us between the ages of 30 and 40 because there are 14,000 college students in their early 20s, but there don’t seem to be many single people near my age (36).

Be Yourself

As I prepared for the evening I thought about manufacturing a more exciting profession for myself – maybe astronaut, lion tamer or street mime – but I figured no one would believe I was courageous enough to be a street mime.

I thought about inventing a persona for myself: “Hi, my name is Cranshaw. I own five castles, three professional sports teams and a snow cone cart. I am also a four-time Olympic Gold Medalist in the 60-meter skip.”

But as always I went with honesty as the best policy: “I’m a newspaper staff writer. I enjoy hiking, Frisbee, tennis, listening to music, cooking, talking (and listening), sharing housework duties and flying one of my private jets to my Caribbean island (Oops, there I go reverting to my fictional persona with that last one).”

I figure if a woman doesn’t like me for who I am, then I probably wouldn’t be interested in her, either.

Before the actual speed dating began we had a half-hour mingle session. Sure enough, I started doing my best “wallflower” impersonation – standing off to one side and attempting by trial and error to determine the hors d’oeuvres ingredients – when a beautiful female meandered over and joined my culinary speculation.

“What a pleasant surprise,” I thought to myself.

Then it was time to proceed with the dating. It was so fun. Perhaps it was the reporter in me. Perhaps it was the comfort in knowing that for five minutes, at least, I had a legitimate reason to talk with each woman.

Whatever the reason, I found myself opening up and feeling as if I’d known each them for 20 years.

I had a great time meeting everyone, but with each woman I discovered that five minutes just wasn’t quite long enough. I found myself wishing for at least twice that amount, and in some cases much more.

Speed dating is a great learning or practice tool for less-experienced daters. It’s a way to meet other single folks and a way to make friends. You might even meet your future spouse (or your future ex-spouse, judging by today’s divorce rate).

I don’t know what these women thought of me, but some of them did agree to give me their e-mail address so I guess I’ll find out soon.

Would I participate in a similar speed dating event again, you ask, oh gentle reader?
Yes I would (but maybe I won’t need to).